Educating Other People’s Children
Most people want to provide their children the best of everything they can afford. It may only be when people attain the affluence of a Bill and a Melinda Gates that they begin to consider that their abundance of financial resources might become a detriment to their children and therefore start to divest themselves of funds by funding efforts to help other people’s children.
But really, we all benefit from helping other people’s children, and nowhere is this more true than in the area of education. Throughout the millennia, as well as being objects of love and pride, children have been a sort of personal social security policy. People invested in their children’s future in part because doing so was a way of investing in their own future. It was expected that if one’s children were a success one not only earned bragging rights, but also attained assurance that those children would make certain that one was well cared for when one could no longer care for oneself. Payback time.
Emanating from this point of view, is a desire not only to provide one’s children with all they need to succeed, but with all they need to compete. It is not enough that one’s child get good grades. One’s child must get better grades than other people’s children who may be competing for the same school or the same scholarship—or later, the same job. This perspective can cause people to feel resentment if earnings they could be spending on the betterment of their own children’s education are taxed to provide better education to the children of someone else—possibly someone who has not earned as much, or saved as much, or in some cases worked as much—only to enable those other people’s children to better compete with one’s own.
However, it is most likely on those other people’s children whom one’s life most directly depends. When we go to a deli counter or restaurant we need to know that instilled in the person working behind the counter or in the kitchen is an ethic that would not allow them to be handling our food if they are coughing and sneezing. When we hire someone to work on a home remodel we need to be confident that that person has mastered basic arithmetic and geometry and the requisite technical skills. We need to know that auto manufacturers have built for us safe and functional vehicles, and later when we bring those vehicles to an auto mechanic, we need to be confident the mechanic has analyzed and corrected all present problems. When we go to the pharmacy we rely on the ability of assistants behind the counter to properly transcribe our prescription so that it can be properly filled. Our own children, if well educated and successfully employed, are probably off at work—possibly even in another state. It is these other people’s children on whom we depend every day of our lives.
And it’s not just from the middle rung of the success ladder that we depend on other people’s children. We also need to know instilled in upper management is an ethic of responsibility, accountability, excellence, empathy and compassion such that the policies management puts in place ensure the best, most qualified people are hired, corners are not cut, supervision and oversight are provided, and people are given time off when needed—even if these measures appear to cost a bit more in the short term. At the same time, upper management requires skilled efficiency experts, putting in place systems that expedite service and hold costs in check without resorting to cutting corners or compromising on product quality or employee relations. These management skills do not come naturally. They must be taught. For a society, the most efficient time to teach these skills is in school—before people enter the work force. All corporations benefit from a work force and a consumer base that has been provided by the government a k-12 education. An evidenced-based program called Roots of Empathy is “changing the world one child at a time,” with guest-parent-infant workshops for grades k-8. More emphasis not less is needed on interpersonal and organizational skills. Whether applied to completing homework, putting on a school play, or playing a baseball game, all these habits of behavior can be taught from the time a child enters kindergarten through to the time they receive their diploma. Remember that book, “Everything I Ever Needed To Know I Learned In Kindergarten.” What happens when students do not learn these lessons in kindergarten, or any other time from k-12?
Speaking of empathy and efficiency, government needs to provide clear and concise systems in which the public and private sector interface so that people do not have to wait years to receive Veterans’ benefits, or a professional license, or a green card, or action in response to a complaint. Many people have turned negative toward the government. But destroying government—“starving the beast” and laying off government workers—will not make government more efficient, nor will it make people’s lives any easier. Educated, quality government workers (from top to bottom) will. We need to be able to trust that people in government know how to create and communicate policies and protocols; and implement tools such as information systems, quality assurance programs, testing and licensing requirements, sick leave and wage minimums, equitable taxation and distribution of benefits, appropriate laws with incentives and penalties…. Effective legislation and forward-thinking public policy can create a healthy space for growth within the culture. However, it requires strong critical thinking skills to devise and communicate user-friendly systems that will fairly and effectively serve a global super-power with a populace as large and diverse as that of the USA. These skills need to be coached in schools. Civics, history, and literature classes are all rich with material for such lessons. Yet, I recently heard reported that most members of Congress only have a 10th grade level of communication competence. I don’t doubt that. However, what disturbs me even more than the lack of communication competence in Congress are the bizarre analogies I have heard uttered by Supreme Court Justices that have caused me to question not only their communication skills, but also their reasoning skills.
And then there are the geniuses on whom we rely. Chances are, it will be other people’s children who discover the next cures for cancer, diabetes, Alzheimer’s…. Other people’s children will probably develop the next life saving medical devices and the next effective missile defense system. Other people’s children will probably invent the next high-tech means of information storage and communication, or modes of transportation. After all, your kid, as ingenious, and well educated, and industrious as he or she may be, can’t do everything.
In every aspect of life and at every juncture we rely upon other people’s children being knowledgeable, competent, and trained in conscientious ethical behavior. At no time is our reliance on these qualities being instilled in other people’s children more crucial than in those later years of our lives when we may be most helpless and unable to care for ourselves. Chances are, when we have our first heart attack it will be other people’s children on the EMT team and driving the ambulance (and other people’s children deciding whether to get out of the way or try to race out in front); and it will be other people’s children who hold our hearts in their hands and control the flow of anesthesia during the surgery; and other people’s children making sure that our catheter’s are kept hygienic, that our pillows are not placed on the floor when the linens are changed, and that germs are not being swept from another patient’s room into ours. One’s own children will probably be busy with their own lives, their own children, and the requirements of their own jobs. Hopefully, they will take the time to visit should we end up in the hospital, but even if present they cannot keep an eye on and control of everything. Our lives will likely hang on the skills, ethics, critical thinking, innovation, dedication, conscientiousness, compassion, expertise—and yes, education—of other people’s children. So when it comes down to it, from birth to death, morning to night, 365 days a year, it is mostly on other people’s children whom our own lives depend. In fact, it is mostly on other people’s children that our own children’s lives (and their children’s lives) depend.
So, as we as individuals, and we as a nation, consider how we want to allocate resources, we might want to contemplate just how much our own lives, and the lives of those we love, depend on our allocating our resources effectively toward the education of other people’s children.
** Nothing connected with this blog or this website should be considered counseling or treatment. **
